Pretty girls make my kokoro go doki doki: Archive

2 tags

DON'T DRIVE DRUNK.

From 6pm-6am on New Year’s Eve/Day AAA will take your drunk self and your car home for FREE, member or not: 800-222-4357

Jan 1st

14,668 notes

1 tag

I have quite endearingly noisy neighbors. They’re spontaneously playing music with pots, pans, and a tambourine, and they’re quite good at it.

Jan 1st

Twilight Books Summary

— Book 1. Twilight: 
Edward: Hey.
Bella: OMG, I'm so silly. And horny.
Edward: Yes. I'm dangerous. I sparkle.
Bella: OMG you're a vampire!
Edward: Yes. Let's go play baseball.
James: I like your girl, Edward. Gotta eat her.
Edward: Roar.
James: Omnomnom Bella.
Bella: OMG I'm screaming in agony! Yes, I will be a vampire!
Edward: I'm gonna kill you, James! I'm gonna suck Bella as well. LOLJK you're not a vamp.
Jacob: Oh, hi there!
— Book 2. New Moon: 
Edward: Oops, gotta go.
Bella: OMG don't leave me! OMG I'm so depressed and dying in agony again.
Jacob: Oh hi there! I'm a semi-naked shape-shifter! (I mean, a werewolf!)
Bella: OMG I don't miss Edward anymore, I love you Jake! 
Alice: Edward is gonna kill himself!
Bella: OMG no! BRB Jake, you're not important anymore.
Edward: I'm going to do the worst ever. I will sparkle Italians to death.
Volturi: You suck.
Bella: OMG leave him alone!
Volturi: OK, leave now bitches.
Jacob: I love you, Bella.
Bella: OMG I love Edward more, bye!
— Book 3. Eclipse: 
Victoria: I'm back, bitch! I'ma cut you!
Bella: OMG no!
Edward: I'ma protect you, dinner! (I mean, Bella)
Jacob: I want to kill her too!
Riley: I will kill you!
Bella: OMG I'm frozen!
Edward: Shit I'm so cold and can't get you hot.
Jacob: Move on bitch, I will warm this whore.
Victoria: You missed me bitches?
Edward: I killed James, you twat! Now you're dead!
Bella: OMG kiss me Jake! Kay, gotta go I'm marrying Edward.
— Book 4. Breaking Dawn: 
Edward: I don't want to fuck you, Bella. Marry me first.
Bella: OMG shit, okay.
Jacob: My heart is broken!
Bella: OMG and so is my water! I've been prego for 3 days and now my baby is ready to go!
Edward: Oh no, a monster!
Renesmee: I'ma kill you, mom :3
Volturi: We're gonna kill that bitch, she's a monster.
Bella: OMG finally I'm a vampire! I'ma protect ma man and ma family and some other random bitches.
Volturi: Fine, you won.
Jacob: Bella I never loved you. I wanna fuck your daughter.

Jan 1st

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Jan 1st

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Jan 1st

554 notes

Jan 1st

1,730 notes

1 tag

Jan 1st

1,382 notes

2 tags

Jan 1st

354 notes

Jan 1st

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Dec 31st

451 notes

Dec 31st

5,944 notes

Dec 31st

103,800 notes

Dec 31st

20,155 notes

1 tag

Dec 31st

76 notes

Dec 31st

19,516 notes

Dec 31st

46,242 notes

DON'T DRIVE DRUNK.

From 6pm-6am on New Year’s Eve/Day AAA will take your drunk self and your car home for FREE, member or not: 800-222-4357

Dec 31st

14,668 notes

Dec 31st

19,817 notes

1 tag

ingloriousfreak: onelifelefttolivetoforgive: These are not chips. They are crisps. These are chips. That is all.

Dec 31st

81,613 notes

2 tags

Dec 31st

4,092 notes

2 tags

Okay I'm starting to run out of ideas...

Which means I can either stop playing with Omegle, or I can ask for suggestions. Guess which one I’m going with?

Dec 31st

3 tags

Dec 31st

3 notes

3 tags

Dec 31st

2,407 notes

Dec 31st

88,060 notes

Dec 31st

4,081 notes

3 tags

Dec 31st

1 note

3 tags

My body is not ready for ALA.

:(

Dec 31st

2,209 notes

Watch

sachimo: thatsmoderatelyraven: durianseeds: sachimo: times where i thought it was taking a picture but it was actually taking a video omg gudfkjbadhsjkdfs does she know its a video OH MY GOD WHY DOES THIS STILL EXIST

Dec 31st

24,115 notes

appleznbananaz started following you

toastandmarmaladies: Hey there! Hello!

Dec 31st

3 notes

Double fisting Omegle chats is a good start to...

Dec 31st

2 tags

Dec 31st

2,713 notes

1 tag

jamiesayslove started following you Your stranger likes you ♥

Dec 31st

jamiesayslove: ‘John, I am waiting for the delivery of a package. The man handling it is named Lamont Toucey. Check his credentials when he arrives. And don’t mind the laughter, he does that. -SH’ I LOVE THIS. You’re welcome.

Dec 31st

I should never got to bed early.

I went to sleep at 9, and now I’m up and awake at 3 AM. I think my body is just incapable of sleeping more than 6 hours.

Dec 31st

1 tag

Today has been an emotional rollercoaster.

Down, up, down… I’m currently fixed very solidly in ‘down’, and it fucking sucks. I’m gonna go practice some Rosetta Stone or something and pretend like the rest of the world doesn’t exist.

Dec 31st

6 tags